Our sweet Mayson

Okay, I apologize in advance because this is going to be a lengthy post. Most people get to show off their babies all the time. I too have a desire to show off my sweet baby so I thought now would be a good time.

My due date was October 23, 2008, which was last Thursday. I have been trying to find the time ever since then to pay tribute to my sweet baby.

Curtis and I did not think we could have anymore kids, but we always felt we had one more waiting. In January 2008 some tests were done and they told us because of Curtis' chemotherapy for his cancer he would no longer be able to have kids. Two days later we found out we were expecting.

We were ecstatic! What a miracle! The boys were excited too. We started preparing and anticipating.

On my 19 week mark my water broke. I did not realize what it was at the time because who thinks their water is going to break at 19 weeks of gestation? I was immediately hospitalized for a week with fluids being pumped into me to see if it would help continue the pregnancy. After a week I was sent home and told that the odds were against me. I was informed that normally after ones water breaks there is a 24 hour period where either baby dies or mother goes into labor. Neither of those things had happened yet so I was told to go home and pray to make it to 24 weeks for viability.

I did go home and I did pray as did everyone around me. We prayed for a miracle and we got one - just not the one we originally had hoped for.

On June 22, 2008 I went into the hospital because of a severe backache. Turns out I had a chorio infection. Chorio not only kills babies, but it kills mothers. The doctors had to induce me right away to start me on antibiotics.

At 11:25 p.m. our miracle was born. He was beautiful. He was perfect. He was alive! Against all odds he made it through 3½ weeks after my water breaking and he made it through the delivery. We named him Mayson Curtis Cornell. He was 1.2 lbs and was 11 inches long. It was amazing watching him open and shut his mouth, move his tiny fingers and moving his feet and legs. They were small movements, but they were amazing. He did not like his feet touched. When we touched the bottom of his feet he would jerk his leg away from us.

Curtis, my dad, and my brother Tyler gave Mayson a name and a blessing. This was an amazing moment and I am so glad we were able to do this for him.

Mayson passed away at 12:00 a.m. on June 23, 2008.

Mayson gave us 35 minutes of heaven. I have never felt such a strong spirit and I know that even when his heart stopped beating he was still with us. I know that he is still with us now.

Here are some pictures of our sweet Mayson...


This is Mayson's, mine, and daddy's hands.

This is Mayson's feet with daddy's wedding ring. It reminds me of how small he was. His little body was small, but it was perfect!

Mayson's funeral was on Wednesday, June 25, 2008. I told Cayden, Bryce, and Gavyn that they could give Mayson anything they wanted and we would put it in his casket with him. They loved it and these are the items they chose. Cayden gave Mayson one of his favorite shirts. Bryce gave him the red and white giraffe. Gavyn gave him a tennis ball. The M&M's are from his nana and pappy Cornell. If you know my kids at all you would know that this fits their personalities perfectly!

We let 35 white balloons go at the funeral because he was alive for 35 minutes. The picture at the top of my blog is a picture of the white balloons from the funeral. This is us after the services were over next to Mayson's casket.

One of the things I was so excited for was when we finally got the headstone. I know that might sound strange, but I felt like it was a gift we were able to give him. The headstone came on September 11, 2008. We love it!

I miss my sweet baby so much, but I am so grateful for the short time I had to spend with him. He was and still is our miracle! I think about him everyday and I look forward to when I will see him again. Knowing that someday I will be able to raise him brings so much joy to my heart.

I want to thank everyone for all the love they have given me, Curtis, and the boys. I have never felt such an outpouring of love. The hospital staff were amazing, especially the sweet nursery nurse. Thank you for checking up on me, you are amazing! Thank you to everyone in my ward for all the meals, snacks, babysitting, and visits. I hope you know how much we appreciate and love you. Thank you to my family and friends! You are amazing and I love you. I also want to tell my husband that he is amazing. I love you and thanks for always knowing what I need and letting my cry on your shoulder. My sweet little boys have been amazing. I am so grateful for each day I have with them.

I do not understand why things happened this way, but I know that my Heavenly Father loves me and my family and I know that he is aware of me and my needs. I have felt his love and his comfort and I know that someday I will understand - and I am okay with that. I love him and I trust him.

Mayson, I miss you and I love you!